Thriving Past Cancer: Marine's Journey

 Greetings my dear friends and followers! I know it's been a while since my last post. At the time I thought that living entailed never looking back, but here I am at the brink of a three year remission, needing to look back.  So much to tell- but I think changing it up is essential. Instead of writing, I will be creating VLOGs.  I'm done hiding my true self, hoping Chucky wont come back if I'm quiet, meek and docile. Watching Mulan during my first chemo-treatment (today), or shall I say 9th treatment since the beginning taught me that "There is no Courage Without Fear!"  Henceforth, you can get your Daily Dose by subscribing via you-tube. To check it out click on the following blue link:  Daily Dose of Marine 

There is a time shift that occurs post trauma. One feels as though they no longer completely belong to the world and yet they are here. Reality shifts, perspectives broaden. Magic happens. This is where I have been since my last post. I thought my blogs were over. It stretched through the trauma and I came out on the other end, and that people no longer wanted or needed to hear of my inner workings. But, in the months that have passed people have reached out asking why I have stopped writing, what is happening, and urging me to continue. It wasn’t until this last week when I lost myself in  The Book of Joy (A collaborative masterpiece by two of this planet’s most prominent spiritual leaders: Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama) that I realized that events shape us. However, we hold the ultimate power. We can either see any given moment as life ruining or empowering. We can see the negative and rip at it, or we can take a step back and explore alternate perspectives.  I le...

June 26th is anther one of those days which resonates in volumes, at least for me. It goes up there with September 11th, December 25th, and January 1st. Year in and year out, each of these days mark a day in which short term memories have transformed into long term ones. We all have similar days, our birthdays, the day our children were born, the day a friend/parent died. I remember numerous June 26ths, some quite fondly for it is the day I married the love of my life. Nineteen years ago today, we became a team, for better or for worse, he became the Yin to my Yang. Somewhere in between 1999 and 2017 the whirling of life  picked us up and tousled us about. Some anniversaries were marked by dinners and presents, especially the first few while others slipped from memory like a dream. Ryan was as guilty of this as I. Within the comfortable walls of our relationship, marking days became irrelevant, unnecessary. Until June 26th, 2017 left us no option. Last June 26th was the day o...

I was seventeen when my niece, Sarin Wakimian, was born. I was transitioning between teenhood and adulthood, preparing myself for endless college possibilities, planning my perfect future, questioning life, because obviously that's something we humans love doing: would I travel the world and become a famous reporter, write novels in a cabin off of Walden Pond, or treat patients in a psych ward somewhere? I dreamt, as all children do. And I dreamt big. Sarin penetrated my dreams. She drew me out of my teenage egocentricism and brought into my world a freshness I had yet to experience. I held her, played with her, and loved her intensely. Two years into my college revelry, Sarin began exhibiting physical ailments that impacted her life. Inflammation hindered her ability to walk and instead of toddling and running around she began to withdraw into her own hell. A frown replaced her smile as her reality shifted. She slowly lost her mobility and just when children are preparing f...

If you ask any kid what he/she wants to be, they all claim they want stardom. They want to become famous you-tubers or gamers, fame being the underlying constant. I dare you to examine your own desires. What makes you happy? Praise? A bonus on your paycheck? Recognition? A bigger house? A nicer car?    Most of us grew up playing The Game of Life and what we aspired to achieve on that board game has engrained itself upon our souls as truth. Somehow, we’ve become brainwashed into thinking we need and want more.   I don’t know about you, but I have an inner drive that reminds me of a wind-up toy. There were times in my life that I felt the urge for more and went for it. Two masters-degrees later, a home, a husband, a great job, and two kids to boot, I’ve realized that I’ve been playing the adult version of “LIFE.”  Cancer helped me pause the game. It helped me sit back and reevaluate the rush towards the end. Why are we headed there with blindfolds on?...

On the brink of a new year, I can’t help but pause to reflect upon this 365-day journey. Christmas of 2016 is when my cancerous adventure started. Since then, I’ve walked numerous paths-some metaphorical and some literal. Within one full year, I was diagnosed with cancer, endured western medicine, submerged myself in eastern medicine to reclaim my life, was donned as being in remission and have traveled to both Hawaii and Grass Valley looking for answers. I sought an end to my mental confusion. I sought a rebirth on the volcanic spiritual grounds of a culture that has changed over time… I sought peace. I came to realize many truths last week-some of which I’d like to share with you for one of those truths led me to the realization that we are all walking challenging paths, clouded with hope and sorrow on any given day. I was reading a JIMBO TIMES: the LA Storyteller blog, when I realized that each of us in his/her own right are wrestling with similar questions: Why am I ...

I am happy to say that I celebrated my 40th birthday two days ago.  I awaited it eagerly and when I awoke that morning, I exclaimed, "I made it! I made it to 40!" I never thought it would mean as much as it did, but it does, just as each morning is a celebration of life and a blessed celebration all its own. I don't know what to expect anymore. Each day is different and sometimes, the most magical of things come to pass without any warning. Had a day like this recently and I was reminded by it the night of my birthday when CJ (the individual I talk about below) texted me to wish me a Happy Birthday. I was taken aback by that text for reasons that are too long to explain here. But what I would like to explain today is how CJ entered my life two weeks ago. One of my best friends, an animation editor who works in Burbank, CA, asked me recently if I'd be willing to help a friend of his with a grant. Why did he reach out to me with this request? Well, for starters, h...